raisingkidswithlove

You don't have to be perfect to be the perfect parent!

“Mommy time out” a must!


mommy time out
Do you need a Mommy Time Out?? 
Sometimes cabin fever can result in a little Mommy overload.  Remember, you can carve out a few moments for a “time out” if you try.  This will allow you then to give yourself totally to your child again without feeling “put out” about it!  How can you do it???  Here are a couple of my suggestions and then add some of yours…..
1.  Play some calming music.  Background noise of music can bring a calming effect on you and your child!  When your “time out” is over…try playing some upbeat fun music to lighten the mood, dance!
2.  Take just 5 minutes to sit by yourself. A cup of tea and a piece of paper to jot down what is good about your day right now always brings perspective.
3.  Give yourself a little grace…it is fine to be a little stir crazy, allow the feeling and move on, no guilt allowed.
4.  Simplify….don’t put pressure on yourself to have the perfect craft or activity for your child, remember child led play is more important than parent led play.  Put a few options out there and then sit on the floor with your child and flip through a magazine…instant Mommy time out.
5.  Take a bath or shower as soon as Dad gets home…light a candle and put on the music, even if you only have 10 minutes…you don’t need much time to rejuvenate.
6.  Remember sunlight even through a window is a mood booster…stand in front of the window and repeat “I am a good Mom!”
7. Take a brisk walk or plan time to head to the gym. Getting your heart pumping is good for your health and your soul. Good feeling hormones after exercise can be a real mood booster.
8.  Go to bed early….when your kids do, some of my best alone time is in bed with a book…who says an 8:00 bedtime is too early!!

Take a “Mommy time out” and you will enjoy being a Mom even more…trust me.  Happy Mother’s Day to all of you wonderful Moms!Take a breath, enjoy the joyful moments of each day, and remember you don’t have to be perfect to be the perfect parent.

Cindy

Vaccines….are they safe? Do they work?


Vaccines do work!  Don’t wait…vaccinate!

How Can a Parent Decide if Vaccines are Safe?

Every day parents are bombarded with information from doctors, nurses, TV hosts, books and the list goes on.  Parents are best served by listening to a team of experts.  We must trust the health care system that has given us the tools to prevent diseases that were so prevalent in children just a few years ago.  Committees of expert scientists, clinicians and health care providers serve on the CDC (Center for Disease Control and Prevention), AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics), the Infectious Diseases Society of America and other groups.  These experts look at scientific studies to see if they are performed carefully, are published in reputable journals and can be reproduced.  Studies that do not meet these standards are not considered reliable.  These groups have pulled vaccines in the past that have been determined to have unsafe side effects or side effects that outweigh the benefit of the vaccine.  The groups have also repeatedly looked at studies regarding vaccines and asthma, diabetes, multiple sclerosis, SIDS and autism.  No studies have shown a reliable causal relationship between vaccines and these illnesses.  Be careful what you read…be sure it is reliable!

How vaccines work:

  1. A vaccine is usually given by a shot.  At this time, there is one oral vaccine for rotavirus.
  2. The vaccine contains a dead or weakened germ that will NOT cause the disease.
  3. The body makes antibodies to fight the weak or dead germs in the vaccine.
  4. These antibodies practice on the weak germs so when the real strong disease germs, which are still out there, enter the child’s body the ready antibodies will know how to destroy them and the child will not become sick.
  5. Antibodies fight infectious diseases and usually stay in a person’s system even after the disease is gone to protect him or her from getting sick again–that is immunity.
  6. Newborn babies are immune to many diseases because they have antibodies from their mothers—this only lasts about a year.  The timing of the vaccine schedule is such that a child will develop immunity to a disease before he or she is most vulnerable.
  7. Immunizations protect your child and the community—herd immunity.  Herd immunity protects unborn children, the elderly whose immunity may have waned and babies that are not yet fully immunized.
  8. When you choose to immunize your child and follow the recommended guidelines, your child is protected from diseases that can cause death, disability, or severe illness and even though we don’t often see these diseases; they are still out there today!

What About Side Effects?

If your definition of  safety is something that does not have any side effects–then a vaccine is not 100% safe.   All vaccines have side effects, but most of them are very mild.  This might include a fever, soreness, redness or swelling at the vaccine site, and fussiness.  Some side effects are more severe, but these are much rarer.  Some parents ask if it would be safer to avoid the vaccine and the possible side effects.  This is a choice that also has side effects, ones that are much more serious.  The risk of your child being infected with the disease the vaccine prevents is greater than the risk of the serious side effects.

I Never See These Diseases, Why Get a Vaccine?

Many of the diseases that vaccines prevent are common.  Pertussis or whooping cough is a very common disease that if your child is not immunized against–they are very likely to become ill with the disease.  This is a serious disease especially in infants and the elderly.  Last year in the Indianapolis area, there were large pockets of whooping cough outbreaks in several schools.

Many of the diseases could become common again.  H-flu diseases such as meningitis and measles mumps and rubella have all “popped up” in areas where the immunization rates have fallen.  A measles outbreak in the Indianapolis area during the Super Bowl a few winters ago and a more recent outbreak beginning in Disneyland both demonstrated how contagious this disease is and how quickly the disease can spread among children and adults who are not fully immunized.

Some diseases such as polio and diphtheria have essentially been eliminated from this country, but still occur in other countries.  We are a small world with many people traveling internationally; your child can be exposed to these diseases by traveling or by people who have entered this country.

Following the recommended immunization schedule is one of the best decisions you can make for your child’s health.  Here is the most recent approved vaccine schedule. Don’t wait, vaccinate!  

Take a breath, enjoy the joyful moments of each day, and remember you don’t have to be perfect to be the perfect parent.

Cindy

Taking Care of Your Child’s Teeth


This cute little smile cost us several thousand dollars later to straighten it out….but worth it!

There is nothing cuter than a toothless grin of a baby.  Next the cute little pearly whites that erupt create a darling smile, then there is a toothless grin again as the tooth fairy starts to make visits to your home, and then soon your child will have  two big front teeth that look way too big for their mouth.  As your child grows, their dental needs change too.  Why is dental health so important for children? Dental decay is the most common chronic childhood illness.  There are at least 4 million preschoolers who have had at least one cavity.  Forty to fifty percent of children will have cavities before the age of five.  51 million school hours are lost each year due to dental health problems.  The American diet is high in sugar, and we are using more and more  non-fluoridated bottled water for drinking.  This all adds up to an increase in dental cavities, and a decrease in dental health of our children.  Children with cavities in their primary or “baby” teeth have more problems with poor weight gain, iron deficiency, speech problems and poor dental health as adults.  Taking care of our children’s teeth is part of good health care!

I.  When do baby teeth form and erupt?

  •  The primary teeth or baby teeth begin to form before your baby is born at about the 14th 19th week of pregnancy.  The crown, or the white part of the tooth that is seen, continues to develop until several weeks to several months after your child is born.
  • Total of 20 baby teeth, 10 on top and 10 on the bottom by about age 3.
  • The first tooth to appear usually is the lower central incisors (the bottom two teeth) around 6 months of age.  Don’t panic if your baby’s first tooth isn’t the lower two teeth…some baby’s teeth erupt to the beat of their own drummer!
  • Teething can be painful for infants.  Babies explore their world with their mouths, and during teething this can be uncomfortable.  There can be redness, swelling in the gums, drooling, increase in finger sucking, and the need to bite and chew on any object.  Some babies will pull at ears or rub their jaw line, teething pain is often referred to the ear area.
  • Sometimes parents will see a “blister” where the tooth is about to erupt, this is normal.
  •  Many babies  like a clean teething ring, frozen wash cloth, frozen fruit in a mesh feeder, frozen bagel or mom’s fingers to rub the gums.
  • You can give acetaminophen, or ibuprofen (after 6 months of age) to help with the pain.  Ibuprofen is a bit more effective for inflammation of the gums, but wait until your baby is at least 6 months to use this!
  • Do NOT place oral numbing ointments on your baby’s gums.  These over the counter remedies contain benzocaine. These treatments have little or no benefit and can cause a serious and sometimes fatal decrease in oxygen carried in your child’s bloodstream. Benzocaine is an ingredient in common treatments like Orajel, Baby Orajel, Anbesol and Orabase.
  • Do NOT use homeopathic teething tablets. The FDA found there was inconsistent amounts of  the toxic substance belladonna in these teething tablets.
  • Teething pain usually occurs for 3 to 4 days prior to the tooth breaking through the gum.  Pain should decrease once the tooth breaks through the gum line.  There may still be some discomfort for a few days after.  It is not a month-long process unless your baby is cutting multiple teeth one after the other.
  • Teething does NOT cause a fever, vomiting, diarrhea or cold symptoms.  If your baby has any of these symptoms with teething, he or she is probably ill too.
  • Teething can cause an increase in drooling which can lead to a rash or irritation around the mouth and on a baby’s chest.  Keep the area dry by changing shirts frequently, using absorbent bibs, and “water proofing” the skin with ointments.

II. When is the first dental visit?

  • The first dental visit should be after the first tooth and/or by age 1.  It is important to have your child’s first teeth examined.  Dental problems can begin early.  Children with healthy teeth can eat better, develop better speech, and dental cavities can cause a permanent state of infection in your child.
  •  Usually the first visit is just a visual exam—usually on mom of dad’s lap.  Going to the dentist is just like a well child exam at your child’s doctor.  We want to be sure we support healthy teeth, not just see the dentist when there is a problem!

III.  How do you care for the first teeth?

  • Wipe your baby’s first teeth using a  wash cloth or gauze or a soft bristled baby toothbrush.  Ideally, your baby’s teeth should be wiped or brushed twice a day.  Once in the morning and once before bed.  The earlier your child becomes accustomed to wiping or brushing their teeth, the easier it will be.
  • You can use a small smear (about the size of a grain of rice) of fluoride toothpaste on your child’s tooth or teeth until age 3 and then a pea size amount after age 3.  Fluoride is important!  It helps strengthen your child’s teeth and prevent decay.
  • You should help your child brush teeth until at least age 6.  Children are not coordinated enough to brush teeth well before that.   Sometimes this will be a battle, but it is worth the battle.  We want to form good dental hygiene habits early!  Do what you have to do to get teeth brushed. Check out these tooth brushing songs published by the American Dental Association (ADA). https://www.mouthhealthy.org/en/kids-brushing-playlist
  • Have your child sit on your lap facing out, or you sit on the floor and lean your child back into your lap to brush.
  • Let your child brush after you brush.  Use circular motions on the teeth and brush along the gum line.
  • Use stickers, games, songs, whatever it takes to get the tooth brushing done.  If your child cries, brush quickly…but at least the mouth will be open!
  •  Never put your baby to bed with a bottle of formula or breast milk.  This will result in decay in your baby’s first teeth!
  •  Never put juice or any other sugared drink in a bottle. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends NO juice in the first year of life and limited amounts of juice in older children.
  •  Do not allow your child to walk around with a sippy cup of juice or milk all day long.  This will leave a continual coating of sugars on your child’s teeth.
  •  You can begin to floss your child’s teeth when they start to touch.  Again, this is a good habit to start young!
  • As your child begins to eat table food, try to avoid high sugar snacks.  Sticky snacks are the worst.  Fruit snacks, dried fruit like raisins and any other sticky food must be brushed out of your child’s teeth.

IV.  When do I worry about thumb sucking, finger sucking and pacifiers?

  • It is perfectly normal for infants and young children to need to suck.  Sucking decreases stress in young children and makes for a happier child!
  • It should be discouraged starting at about age 18 months.  Parents should limit pacifier use to bedtime and nap time.
  • All thumb sucking and pacifier use should be discouraged after age 3.
  • Most children stop on their own, but some need help.  Most will then quit with encouragement from the dentist and parents.   Do not use negative reinforcement like hot sauce on a thumb, taping fingers, or putting mittens on your child.
  • Prolonged sucking can create crowded, crooked teeth or bite problem.   The fingers, thumb and pacifier all affect the teeth the same way.

VI. My child grinds his teeth, is this bad?

  • Teeth grinding happens in many toddlers.  The toddler’s molars are very smooth, and children will often grind.
  • Most children outgrow the habit by about age 6.
  • If teeth grinding continues after permanent teeth arrive, then speak with your child’s dentist.

VII.  What should I do if my child injures his mouth and teeth?

  • Be sure and ask your dentist when he or she would like to be contacted for a tooth injury.
  • If a child knocks out a permanent tooth, keep it moist or drop it into cup of milk and call the dentist immediately or head to the ER.
  • If a child is hit in the mouth–always call the dentist for an exam even if there is  no obvious damage.
  • If a child chips a tooth–call the dentist even if there is no sensitivity.
  • Your child should use a mouth guard for sporting activities!

Start good dental habits early…find your child a dental office home where both you and your child are comfortable.  Dental care should not be scary but just a part of good health.  Take care of your child’s smile, it is one of the most beautiful things a parent sees!

Take a breath, enjoy the joyful moments of each day, and remember you don’t have to be perfect to be the perfect parent.

Cindy

www.mouthhealthy.org

www.healthychildren.org

Keep your child’s smile healthy and bright!


ADA_FluoridationRec_CMYK-pea-rice-ADA-e1417021950746

Image courtesy of American Dental Association

I can remember that feeling of excitement when I first saw the top of a little tooth poking through our oldest child’s gum….I must admit I remember the shock the first time I felt that tooth when I was nursing too!

(Remember, children can bite only if latched incorrectly, and that is usually when they are “playing” at the end of a nursing. Put your child down and say, “that hurts!” If you put your baby down every time he or she bites or you break the nursing latch when you realize your baby is no longer sucking to eat…there will be no problems. Just because your baby is teething or has teeth is not a reason in itself to wean from the breast!)

We have always known that care of those cute little teeth was important, but the recommendations in fluoride usage has changed over the years. How we care for our child’s teeth will affect his or her health. Those baby teeth ARE important! Dental decay is an active infection in a mouth…and we want to protect those little pearly whites for the best smiles now and down the road!

Dental decay is the most common chronic disease of childhood! 24 percent of children in the U. S. have a cavity before age four! 53 percent by age 8 and 56 percent by age 15. There has been a significant increase of dental decay in children in the 2-4 year old age group. So, what are parents supposed to do to protect our little ones’ precious smiles? There is a plan!  http://pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/early/2014/11/18/peds.2014-2984.full.pdf+html

  1. Brush with fluoridated toothpaste at the first sign of a tooth. (Yes you heard me correctly…that is a big change from several years ago. Past recommendation was to use “baby toothpaste” without fluoride until age 2!) Starting to brush teeth from moment one teaches a lifelong habit for your child. At a minimum, the recommendation is to brush twice daily, morning and night. The most important brushing is the nighttime one before bed. Parents should use a very small amount of fluoridated toothpaste (the size of a grain of rice) until age 3. (see picture above) After age 3, children and adults should use about a pea size amount of toothpaste. Parents should supervise tooth brushing until about age 8 when most children are proficient. It is not important to worry about what direction to brush on the tooth….just that all sides of the tooth and the gum line are brushed.
  2. Drink tap water! Many of us have become a bit of “water snobs” drinking only a certain brand of bottled water! Most bottled water does not have fluoride. Fluoridated water has been proven to prevent dental decay in children and adults! So fill up your child’s straw cup and get a glass for yourself too!
  3. Monitor sugar and sticky foods. We know that tooth decay increases when there is sugar on teeth for long periods of time. Children who drink sugared drinks (this includes juice!), sleep with bottles, or use a sippy cup with milk or juice in it all day are more prone to decay. Keep water in your child’s cup except at meals and stay away from a lot of sugared or sticky foods and treats.
  4. Prevent bacteria in the mouth. Tooth decay is caused by a bacteria called streptococcus mutans. Parents who have a history of poor dental health (lots of cavities) should be very cautious about sharing cups and cleaning those pacifiers in their own mouths! Transfer of that bacteria early on increases your child’s risk of early dental decay. Most importantly, parents should be sure that their own dental health is good…having active decay that is untreated increases the streptococcus mutans in your mouth increasing the likelihood your child’s mouth will colonize with it too. We want to be sure that the snuggles and kisses you give your child does not transfer bad bacteria…because those kisses are a necessity!!
  5. Find a dental home for your child. Your child should have a dental visit by age 1. Dentists are an important part of your child’s health care just like your child’s doctor! Make every 6 month visits to your child’s dentist to promote good dental health. If your child sees the dentist for preventative care, there may never be a need to develop a fear…there will be no cavities!
  6. Ask about fluoride varnish. Fluoride varnish is a sticky resin of highly concentrated fluoride. Your child can have two or more applications per year and it is very effective in preventing dental decay. Some pediatricians are applying this at well child visits, and often dentists are using this instead of the fluoride rinse or gel of the past. A child can eat right away after this application and it actually will stay on the teeth for a longer time and can help restore early decay.

So those are some of the best tips to prevent decay in your child’s teeth. The habits we form early in our child’s life will have long -lasting effects on their dental health and smiles in the future. Keep your child’s sweet smile bright!

Take a breath, enjoy the joyful moments of each day, and remember you don’t have to be perfect to be the perfect parent.

Cindy

www.mouthhealthy.org

The “how to” of the discipline process


 

Remember our mantra:  “Attention is attention to a child whether it is negative or positive, attention to a behavior reinforces it!”  And  “Consistency is the key.”

A few pointers to start:

1.  Set realistic guidelines. Know your child’s developmental stage. As a parent, you may want your child to share his toys with friends, sit still during church and say “please” and “thank you”, but  you have to consider what’s age appropriate when it comes to behavior — and gauge your expectations accordingly.  Do not discipline when the child is not able to comply because of age or development.

2.  Be patient. Patience is the key.  Often parents will complain that they have tried a discipline strategy and it didn’t work.  Timeout was tried over and over again, but the behavior continued.  Remember, it takes a while for your child to test to see if you really mean it, and then it takes a while for a child to gain control of the behavior.  Children’s temperaments also play a role.  Consistency is the key, say what you will do and then do what you say every single time.

3.   Acknowledge your child’s feelings. When it comes to discipline, parents need to be warm but firm.  Give your child the words to describe a feeling.  “I know you are frustrated, but we don’t hit.”  “I know you are angry with mommy”  “I know you are sad.”  Helping your child describe what he is feeling with words will eventually decrease the acting out.  This also helps your child begin to develop  empathy, he or she will know how others feel because they have felt it too.

4.   Listen. As your child gets older, parents will need to listen to a child’s reasoning.  It is fine to give an older child a chance to explain, and even accept the child’s explanation, but there should not be engagement in an argument. Arguing will not convince a child that as a parent you are right.  You simply will say, “I know that you don’t understand now and are upset, but this is my decision.”  Parents should never engage in an argument with young children; toddlers and preschool age children will never look at you and say “I understand Mom, I will go to time out!”  🙂

5.  Model good behavior. To teach manners and socially acceptable behavior, most children will learn by modeling.  When a child is prompted “Say thank you.”  “Say I am sorry.” and the child sees the parent model the behavior,  they will eventually incorporate those manners and behaviors.  Do not force but help your child become socially acceptable.  If your child will not say please, thank you or sorry, say it for the child.  “Connor says “Please.”  Modeling poor language, yelling, name calling etc. will result in a child behaving like you!

6.   Give your child choices. Many times you can head off a conflict with choices.  Giving choices often increases cooperation.  When a child feels more control, they often will not act out as much.    Choices about which outfit to wear, choices between two healthy foods, even give choices for non negotiable things like brushing teeth.  “I know that you don’t like brushing teeth, but it is important, so would you like to brush your teeth now or after you put on your pjs?”  Find every day choices for your child.

7.  Know when to walk away. Temper tantrums are a child’s way of blowing off steam and communicating their frustration.  They are a part of almost every child’s normal growth and development during the toddler years.  Some children have more than others. If you respond to them then you validate that behavior; but if you ignore them you will see them gradually subside.  If a child is totally out of control with a tantrum,  sit next to your child, speak soothingly and place your hand on him gently. Touch will often calm.  Do not pick up and comfort, this will again encourage the behavior.  Tantrums often will occur when a child is hungry, tired, or has figured out that they work! Don’t engage with an older child if you feel like he is “pushing your buttons”.  If you feel frustrated walk away until you can respond calmly.  This won’t reinforce the behavior and teaches them appropriate behaviors to model.

8.  Be creative and fun. Many times a child will be more cooperative and need less discipline if a parent “plays to gain cooperation”.  For example, pretending to feed an animal the toys when you pick them up, racing the kitchen timer to get dressed, singing a brush your teeth song, …get silly, have fun, and watch your child cooperate!

  • Remember effective discipline must remove the most valued thing from a child, your attention.  Removing attention is much more effective than spanking or hand slapping which is a temporary fix.

The discipline technique I like is basically the “1, 2, 3 Magic” program developed by Dr. Thomas W.  Phelan PhD.  www.parentmagic.com  This program has been used by countless schools and parents for many years.  It is simple and effective, and can be used with a little modification clear until the teen years.  Even during the teen years, the basic principles are effective.  I teach this program with a few small changes, but this discipline process when used consistently will help with almost every discipline issue.

1,2,3 Magic

1.  The parent calmly gives a warning with words and by holding up 1 finger. “No touching the dog food. That’s one.”

2.  If the behavior stops great, if not the parent gives a 2nd warning by holding up 2 fingers and saying… “That’s two.”

3.  If the behavior stops, great if not the parent holds up a third finger and calmly says, “That is 3, time out.”  or  “That is 3, take a break.” Your child then takes a time out.  This time out should be in a specific place away from activity and toys.  If your child is a toddler, it will need to be in a place where the child can still see you.  If the child is older, the spot can be on a bottom step, in a chair in the other room, or when the child is about 4 or older, the bedroom is a good choice.  The “break” should be about a minute a year. When the “break” is  over,  you act as if nothing had happened.  There are no lectures, or lots of hugs and kisses.  This must be done without emotion or many words!  The more emotion and words that are used, the more attention has been given to the behavior. There should be one short explanation given to the child.  There is  no yelling, and no response to the continued complaining or a fit from the child.  This is so important!!  When a parent does not give a long explanation, does not get emotionally upset, and then follows through with an appropriate time out, the parental authority is unquestionable.  If this is done consistently, the child will know exactly what to expect from a parent.  Remember, consistency is the key!  

Common questions:

  • How long between counts?

Just long enough to give your child a chance to gain control of their behavior and respond.  This does not meant   “That is 1…1 1/2…Listen to Mommy!… 2…. Stop touching it!  You don’t want to go to time out!  2 1/2 …please stop….2 3/4….I really mean it…..!! There is only a few seconds between counts and no extra words or warnings.

  • What if there are several problem behaviors one right after the other?

You do not need to start a new count for each behavior.   For example.. “No cookies now.”  The child screams at you.  “That’s 1.”  The child runs and throws a toy.  “That’s 2.”  The child tries to take a cookie off the pantry shelf.  “That is 3, time out.”

  • What if the behavior is serious, like hitting?

There are several behaviors that you will determine are an automatic 3.  In our house that was hitting, biting, shoving and name calling.   Automatic time outs should occur for any behavior that is physical or aggressive.

  • What if your child counts with you?

I promise if you use this system your child will at some point count with you or give you a 1, 2 or 3 time out!  Try not to laugh.  It is up to you on your response.  You can ignore the counting completely.  No words, no emotions.  If you are able to do that, the behavior will stop.  I could not, it was like nails on a chalk board when one of my children counted with me…so it was an automatic time out in our house.  You decide!

  • What do you do in public?

This is a very common time for children to push the limits, especially if you do not follow through when you are not at home.  Always set your behavior expectations before getting out of the car.  “I want you to hold Mommy’s hand when we are in the store.”  If your child does act out in public, if you are consistent with the 1, 2, 3 Magic at home, often you can control your child’s behavior with just a 1 and a 2.  If you get to 3, then you must find an appropriate time out place where you are.  This could be leaving and going to the car, turning the shopping cart around in the grocery store away from you and ignoring, sitting your child on a chair in the center of the mall…or for a school aged child a delayed time out at home away from TV etc.   Do not go back to lots of talking and emotion when you are out trying to avoid the time out when in public.  If you are embarrassed and back down, then your child will quickly learn you will not follow through when you are out and about!

  • What if the child will not stay in time out?

You must continue to bring the child back to the time out place with no emotion or talking.  Your child will get it!  The first couple of days may result in many trips back to the time out spot, but you must be consistent!  For a young toddler you also may choose to remove the tray off the high chair, strap your child in, and turn the child away from you.  This is a great way to teach time out in the beginning. 

  • What if your child will not come out of time out when it is over?

Do not try to persuade—just say “you can come out when you are ready!”  If you give a lot of attention to this behavior “Come on now, it is all over.  Come on out and play.  Give Mommy a hug…..”  This will result in this behavior again, and may even reinforce the behavior that led to the time out!

  • What if my child yells at me and calls me a “mean mommy or daddy” or “I hate you!”?

I know that this will hurt…no parent likes to hear those words, but you must ignore the behavior!  Your child doesn’t really know what the impact of these words are, he is just angry.  You know that your child loves you and you love him, which is why you are disciplining!   Remember if you respond with emotion and a lot of words, the behavior will happen again!

So those are the simple rules for this discipline approach.  It does work…if the rules are followed.  Soon your child will know what to expect if a behavior is inappropriate and your home will not be filled with spanking, yelling, and lots of arguing and emotional responses.  It takes practice and it takes consistency.  Be patient with yourself!

Take a breath, enjoy the joyful moments of each day, and remember you don’t have to be perfect to be the perfect parent.

Cindy

Childproofing 101


childproofing

Staying ahead of kids in order to keep the house safe is no easy task….some days I would have been better off wrapping my four in bubble wrap!  

New parents have so much to do!  It seems the “to do” list is never-ending.  At the top of every parent’s “to do” list should be child proofing.  Keeping your precious little one safe is a #1 priority, and no simple task.   Children are curious, quick, and smart!  Just when you think that you have your child protected, you find your child standing in the center of the kitchen table swinging from the overhead light….or at least it seems that way!  The truth is, accidents are the leading cause of injury and death in children.  So many of these tragedies can be prevented with a little preparation.  Child proofing is a MUST but, NOTHING replaces supervision.  Child proofing slows a child down but does not totally prevent injury.  Think about child proofing in layers….putting dangerous items in an upper cabinet and then latching the cabinet.  We all know that any self-respecting toddler can push a chair over and reach that cabinet!  Over the next few days, check back and we will go over a room by room check for child proofing and common mistakes that parents make!

General tips:

  • Child proof ahead of your child!  You never know the first time your child will roll over, begin to crawl, or pull up.  Child proof before it is a must.
  • Get on your child’ level to child proof.  That’s right, crawl around and see what your child sees.  You will be surprised at the number of dangers that lurk at your child’s eye level and not yours.
  • Sign up to receive e-mail recall notifications at www.cpsc.gov  New parents have so much baby equipment!  It is hard to keep track of any recalls or safety notices.  By signing up for e-mails on recalls you will be able to make sure your baby equipment is safe.
  • Keep a notebook or spreadsheet with a list of all your baby equipment including serial numbers, and date and place of purchase.  This is a quick reference guide for you to flip to when you receive a recall notice.  Much easier than trying to find the numbers on your baby equipment and remember when and where you purchased it!
  • Take a CPR class for parents!  Local hospitals, the Red Cross, and other agencies offer CPR classes for parents.  Sign up and be a prepared parent….knowledge is the key to peace of mind for you and protection for your child.
  • Install outlet covers in every room.  There are sliding outlet plates that replace your existing outlet plate and have a sliding “door” that slides to cover the outlet.  These are less of a choking hazard.
  • Remove rubber caps off of all door stoppers, they are choking hazards.
  • Keep dangerous chemicals out of reach and locked up, provide a double layer of protection.
  • Program the Poison Control phone number in your cell phone for quick use 1-800-222-1222.
  • Use cabinet and drawer latches.  There are many to choose from!  Pick one that can be installed easily, there are adhesive mount latches for those areas that a parent may not want permanent mountings.
  • Always use the safety belts in bouncy chairs, high chairs, swings…whenever there is one provided!
  • Shorten or go cordless on curtain and blind cords.
  • Know the names of the plants you have in the house, in case one is eaten!  Put all plants out of your child’s reach.
  • Install carbon monoxide detectors on every floor.  Make sure there is one outside of bedrooms.
  • Install smoke alarms in every bedroom and on every level of your home.  Check the batteries every 6 months.
  • Use corner bumpers on furniture with sharp edges.
  • Install window guards for all windows above the first level of a home.  Windows that can be opened more than 4 inches are dangerous.
  • Secure all heavy furniture to the wall.  Every year thousands of children are hurt when furniture is pulled over on them.  Children pull out dresser drawers and use them as steps too.  Keep the tops of furniture cleared of tempting items like toys, and knickknacks to deter a child from climbing up to reach them. This would include tall dressers, entertainment centers, book cases, and large screen televisions.
  • Turn the water heater down to a maximum temperature of 120 degrees F.
  • Keep lighters, matches and lit candles out of reach.
  • Install gates at the top and bottom of stairways.  Do not use pressure mounted gates at the top of stairs.
  • Fire arms should be locked up with a trigger lock in place.  Ammunition should be stored and locked separately from the fire arm. Do not keep fire arms loaded in the home. Teaching children about gun safety does NOT negate the need to lock up your guns.  Children can’t be trusted around fire arms!
  • Make a plan for fire evacuation.  Talk with all members of the family and practice with a fire drill! Buy an escape ladder to store under your bed if you live in a two story home.
  • Test homes built before 1978 for lead paint.  For information about getting paint samples go to the National Lead Information Center’s website.
  • Look for a safety store at your closest children’s hospital.  These stores will sell child proofing products at cost and have safety experts there to answer questions.  If you live in Indiana, the Riley Safety Store is available at several Indiana University Hospital sites.  For more information visit RileyHospital.org, or call toll free 1-888-365-2022 or e-mail kids1st@iupui.edu.
This will give you a start!  Remember, a little prevention goes a long way, but never replaces supervision.  So, get down on those hands and knees and take a look at your home…then make your home as safe as it can be so your child can explore their world!

Take a breath, enjoy the joyful moments of each day, and remember you don’t have to be perfect to be the perfect parent.

Cindy

Infants need play time too!


You are your baby’s first toy! 

Play time is important for infants too!  Infants play by moving, by looking (especially you and that funny face), by exploring with hands, feet, and mouth, and by interacting physically (a little tickle), emotionally, and verbally.  The time your baby spends playing with you is invaluable.  You don’t have to “teach” as you play, your baby is learning by just interacting with you!  You are your baby’s favorite toy! 

Let your baby look at you! 

Your baby is completely enthralled with YOU!  Look at your baby and make silly faces.  You will be amazed by your sweet baby trying to imitate some of your silly faces!  Smile, coo, stick your tongue out…your baby will love it! If your baby keeps looking away, then he or she may have had enough of your silly face for a while, be careful not to over stimulate. This little game stimulates your baby’s social, visual, and emotional development.  This teaches your baby ways to seek and receive your attention and affection.  Who knew that you could be entertained by just looking at your baby!  You and Dad have a new evening entertainment!

Play with touch!

Who doesn’t want to touch that soft baby skin?  Touch your little one with different textures.  Tissues, a blanket, the tip of your finger, a cotton ball…explore different touches across your baby’s tummy or cheeks.  Talking makes this even more fun for your baby.  “Doesn’t that tickle? OOOh feel good?”  Watch your baby and you will be able to tell what his favorite is.  Soon your little one will start to kick and get excited when you just start to touch his little belly.  Touch teaches sensory awareness, verbal interaction and body awareness.

Give your baby something to look at.

A mobile is a great first toy for your child.  It can be colorful or black and white with some accents of red, but your baby will love watching it!  Be sure to take the mobile down once your child can reach it or is starting to try to sit up.  The mobile provides visual stimulation and spatial awareness for your baby.

Try a little singing.

No, you can’t tell if your baby has a singing voice yet, 🙂  but your little one loves the sound of your voice.  He or she has heard your voice even before birth!  Put your baby in the center of the room and walk around the room singing and talking or making funny noises.  Your baby will begin to look for where you are!  Combine a little “Peekaboo” with it!  Your baby will love it.  This will help your baby develop listening skills and it helps develop a sense of trust in you as you disappear and come back!

Take your child on a tour.

Your home and backyard may be familiar to you, but your baby will love the change in scenery.  Carry your baby around the house and you will find all kinds of neat things.  Talk about what you see and what things do.  Light switches are amazing!  Head outside and discover the grass, the leaves, brush a flower across your little one’s cheek, introduce your child to the world!  New sights, sounds and textures are exciting for your baby, and talking about them builds language skills too!  Introducing your baby to the world may just help you appreciate the little things again too!


The oldies but goodies…all the finger plays you used to know
.

Games like Peek-a-boo, So Big, Patty Cake, This Little Piggy, Itsy Bitsy Spider are fun for you and your baby.  These finger plays and songs teach socialization skills, fine motor skills, object permanence, and are just plain fun.  If you don’t remember these oldies but goodies, look them up online or check out a book at the library.

Make an obstacle course.

Your new little crawler will love to crawl over and under things.  Get those pillows and cushions off the couch and start encouraging your baby to climb up and over, crawl, and tumble.   This is fun and helps build gross motor skills and coordination.  It might get your little one good and tired for a great nap too!

Try the fill and dump game.

Once your baby is sitting up and is developing some hand coordination, filling and dumping will be a favorite activity.  Stacking cups, measuring cups, plastic containers all work well to fill up with water in the bathtub, sand, blocks, raw rice or any item that can be scooped up and dumped.  Your baby will work on fine motor control, hand-eye coordination, and words like “full” “pour” “all gone” “empty” and others.

Stacking and knocking over.

Stacking will soon become the next fun activity.  Those same stacking cups can be used to build a tower and knock it down.  Blocks, stacking rings, plastic cups, books…anything can be used to stack and knock over.  This helps with fine motor development and cause and effect.

These are just a few examples of the type of play your infant will love the first 12 months of life.  Don’t rush out and buy lots of expensive toys, you will be your child’s favorite toy these first few months.  There is no rush to “get ahead”; your child will learn all that he or she needs to learn with simple play.  The pressure to get ahead often takes away the most valuable tool for learning…play.  Be a kid again and fill your child’s day with play!  Have fun!

What is your favorite activity with your infant?  Post  some of your ideas!

Follow Raising Kids With Love on Facebook for more tips!

Take a breath, enjoy the joyful moments of each day, and remember you don’t have to be perfect to be the perfect parent.

Cindy

How do you play with a toddler?


“I think of play as a toddler’s number one essential vitamin.  He needs large doses of it every day.  Play:  Thrills the senses.  Helps toddlers master movement.  Stretches the mind.  Stimulates language use.  Boosts friend-making skills.  Stimulates the immune system.  Builds self-confidence.  Improves nighttime sleeping.”

Dr. Harvey Karp, MD  The Happiest Toddler on the Block                                                   

Toddlers love to play, and the fact is, they must play! Play is the basis of learning for a toddler.  So yes, when a toddler squirts a banana out between his fingers, there is learning going on!  Toddlers learn how to manipulate their world through play…and one of the biggest parenting responsibilities is to provide opportunities for your child to have free play.  Developmentally many toddlers have separation anxiety, so they want to be near you when they play, but toddlers do not need you to lead their play.  Play for a toddler is based on exploration.  Too often parents want to “show” a toddler how to play…after all we know how that toy works, we read the directions!  Toddlers enjoy play more and learn more when they figure out their own “right way” to play with a toy; and it often is different from the directions.  The process of discovery through play is the tool to learning.

So how do you play with a toddler?  Here are a few suggestions:

  • Give your toddler physical help when needed.  Often toddlers know what they want to do, but don’t have the gross or fine motor control to actually do it, remember a toddler is “long on will, short on skill!” This will often lead to frustration.  A parent can help but not complete  a task of play for the toddler.  Example:  A toddler may want you to show them how to fill a  bucket to make a sand castle, but doesn’t want you to guide the entire process.  I always had to remind my builder husband of this…he wanted to build the castle, his way! 🙂
  • Be a partner.  Many games need a partner.  A toddler can’t play ball without someone rolling or tossing the ball to him.  Let your toddler play the game until he or she is finished–not you.  Repeating a game many times is how a toddler masters a skill.  Don’t toss a ball a few times and quit when you are  bored!  Over and over again is how play works for a toddler!
  • Demonstrate.  A toddler will like to be given demonstrations on how things work or even suggestions.  Let your child be free to use your suggestion or not.  Do not interrupt his play to bring another idea or “show you how to do it”.  Let your toddler lead the play.
  • Help with concentration.  A toddler’s attention span is only a few minutes especially if the play involves sitting still.  If a parent sits with a toddler to talk, and encourage during a task, then the toddler will be able to  concentrate longer and might be able to complete a difficult task like a puzzle.  Encourage but don’t do it for your toddler.
  • Help your toddler play with others.  Toddlers will enjoy playing next to other children not really with other children.  Parallel play is common at this age.  Children will play next to each other without really cooperating.  Toddlers are not developmentally mature enough to be left with another child to “fight it out”.  They are not capable of sharing or playing fair without help.  Give two toddlers similar materials or toys and let them play as each of them wants without interaction with each other.  Eventually toddlers will  begin to talk to each other, and a friendship will begin to develop.  Often it is helpful for a toddler to play with older children too.   Older children provide good examples of imaginative play, problem solving, sharing and it helps the older child develop leadership skills too.  Guide your toddler in sharing…show them how to do it.  Eventually they will develop the ability to share, but only after being shown many times.
  •   Be a good role model for your child when you play.  Ask if you may take a toy and use the words please and thank you.  When your toddler shares with you, praise your child for good sharing.  Choose cooperative games like playing ball, and other activities that take turns.  This helps teach a toddler good social skills which is  necessary for cooperative play.  Be patient, your child will be capable of sharing and playing with other children some time between the age or 2 and 3, if you have given your toddler the opportunity to develop the skill! One of the most important skills your child will need to develop before school is cooperative play and being a good friend!
  • Beginning at 18 months encourage imitative and imaginative pretend play.  This is a very important step for your toddler.  Your child will start to imitate important people in his or her life, so that would be you!!  Soon that play will change from simply imitating to imaginative play.  Your toddler will take a block and pretend it is a cell phone, or will play “house” with your pots and pans.  This starts symbolic thinking which is very important in developing math and reading skills later.  Imaginative play also teaches empathy…it helps a child start to learn how others feel.  It is fine for your little boy to play pretend with dolls and for your little girl to play pretend with trucks!!  Imaginative play also improves language.  Listen to your toddler, he will self talk as he pretends and will often tell you what to say when you are playing with him!  Join in the conversations!
  • Let your toddler play with safe every day items.  We all know it…your child’s favorite toy may just be the plastic containers in the kitchen, the laundry basket, a silky scarf, or a box!  Expensive toys really are not needed…your imaginative, creative toddler will play with every day things and enjoy it!  These items increase creativity and imagination, so save some money and encourage this!  Remember, a blanket over a card table works just as well as that expensive play house, and a muffin tin and different types of cereal to sort works as well as a fancy sorter!
  • Get a little messy!  Toddlers love sensory play.  Get out the water, the finger paints, the pudding, the play dough, put on an apron and have fun!  Toddlers need messy creative play.  This will bring out the kid in you too! Sensory boxes filled with different items provide lots of creative messy play. Try filling the boxes with Easter grass, dried beans, rice, or anything else you can find at the Dollar Store.  Think pouring and dumping, digging, sorting, searching, feeling, and fun.

So playing with your child is not rocket science.  It is letting your child discover his or her world safely and creatively.  So, sit on the floor, watch your toddler, participate in the play your toddler leads, keep the TV off, and get the plastic kitchen containers out and maybe a little pudding paint…it is going to be a fun day!

Take a breath, enjoy the joyful moments of each day, and remember you don’t have to be perfect to be the perfect parent.

Cindy

Introducing Solid Foods to Your Baby


Our daughter Kelsey loving her solid foods!  She was needing a dunk in the tub after this meal!

I can remember the excitement of introducing the kids to their first tastes of “real food”.  The camera was ready, they were sitting up and eager, and that first bite often resulted in the funniest look as they had that first taste.

I know that starting solid foods often comes along with many questions.  What food is first?  What about allergies?  How much?  When?  And the list goes on and on.  To be honest, there are not many hard and fast “rules” that come with starting your little one on solids.  As with many issue of parenting, you may see many different suggestions and contradictory information which can increase your anxiety.    Like many of my parenting tips, I start by saying “Relax!”  There really is not a “wrong” way to do this!  So get your cameras ready….the introduction to solid food is a milestone for every parent and baby, and is darn cute too!

When is my baby ready?

The American Academy of Pediatrics tells parents that solid foods should be introduced between 4 and 6 months of age.  At any point between 4 and 6 months, it is just fine!  More important than age, we like to see that the baby is developmentally ready for solids.

Why should I wait until my baby is 4 to 6 months old?

Ideally, breast milk or formula should be the main nutrition for a baby’s first 4 to 6 months.  The foods that you introduce after that are really just supplemental to the nutrients in the breast milk and formula.  Solids are really an education in taste and texture for the first year of life.  Breast milk or formula is the core of your baby’s diet for the first full year providing at least 75% of your baby’s calories.  After a year, your baby will start to meet more and more of their nutritional needs through solid foods.  By age 3, a child should only be getting about 10-20% of their calories from milk, and the rest from solid foods.

Isn’t this different from when I grew up?

Maybe.  The school of thought regarding solids has changed over the years.   In the 1920’s, solid foods were seldom offered to babies before a year.  During the 1960’s and 1970’s solid foods often were fed to infants in the first three months.  There are pictures of me being fed rice cereal at just a few weeks of age.  (I AM pretty old!)  Moms were often told then that the cereal would help a young infant sleep through the night.  I promise it doesn’t!   Slowly, we have come almost full circle with the recommendation now to wait until your baby is at least 4 months old.

Why do we wait now?

We have learned that babies are just not developmentally ready for solids.  More important than actual age is your baby’s development.

  • Before 4 months of age, a baby’s digestive system is too immature for solids.
  • Before 4 months of age, a baby’s throat muscles are not developed for swallowing solids and there is a tongue thrust…food that is placed in the mouth is pushed back out with his tongue.  Most babies no longer have this tongue thrust by 6 months.
  • Before 4 months of age, your baby has no ability to tell you that he is full.  Until around 4 to 5 months, babies will not turn their head to refuse food.
  • Before 4 months of age, solid foods will result in your baby taking less breast milk or formula that has the correct amount of nutrients and fat for growth.
  • Solids should be introduced no later than 6 months.  Waiting too long for the introduction of solids can result in a delay in your baby’s eating and chewing skills, and recent studies now show that waiting longer than 6 months of age may actually increase food allergies.

What are some signs that might show my baby is developmentally ready for solids?

  • Your baby is between 4 and 6 months in age.
  • Your baby has at least doubled his birth weight.
  • Your baby can sit with support.
  • Your baby has good head and neck control and is able to turn his head to refuse food.
  • Your baby’s tongue thrust reflex is diminishing.
  • Your baby is breast-feeding more than 8 to 10 times a day and still wants more or your baby is taking 32 to 36 ounces of formula and wants more.
  • Your baby is reaching for your food, or shows an interest when you are eating.

What food should be first?

Traditionally babies have been started on an iron fortified, easily digested cereal, like rice.  This is because at 6 months of age, a baby’s natural iron stores from Mom are beginning to diminish.  So, most parents start with some type of cereal, often rice.  Other than the iron, there is not much nutrition in the rice cereal. I feel that a white rice cereal is not the best choice for a first food….there really is no hard and fast rule regarding what food you should start first.  There are many good options such as:

  • Bananas
  • Avocado
  • Sweet potato
  • Pears
  • Applesauce
  • Carrots
  • Squash
  • Strained meats
  • Whole milk yogurt

First foods should be single ingredients.  Foods should be introduced one at a time with a couple of days in between each new food so if there is any type of reaction you will know which food is likely the culprit!

Some will suggest that a parent introduce vegetables before fruits so the baby does not taste the sweet food first.  I don’t feel this is necessary.  Babies who are breast-fed have tasted sweet…breast milk is sweet!  No matter if a parent introduces fruits or vegetables first, babies will always prefer the sweeter taste.  So, it really doesn’t matter!  Introduce a vegetable, then a fruit, then a meat….whatever works for you and your child!

How do I start?

  1. Start with 1 to 2 tablespoons of a single ingredient pureed food.  It should be a liquid consistency in the beginning.  Your goal is not to fill up your child’s tummy, but to expose him to the new taste and texture.  Be careful not to substitute food for breast milk or formula.  During the first year babies should still have 4-6 breast feedings or 24-36 ounces of formula in 24 hours.  If milk consumption drops, you may be feeding too many solids.
  2. Use your finger as the first spoon and have your baby suck the food off your finger.  You then can move to a rubber coated spoon.
  3. Offer the first meal when you are not in a hurry and your baby is not overly tired or too hungry.  I suggest you nurse or bottle feed first, and then an hour later try the solids.
  4. Always offer the new food in the morning so if your baby would have any kind of reaction or upset tummy, it doesn’t happen at night!
  5. Watch your facial expressions.  Babies learn what foods you like and don’t like!  Everything should be yummy!
  6. If your baby makes a face or gags with the new taste or texture, it does not mean that he doesn’t like the food.  It takes at least 10 to 15 introductions of a food before a baby can develop a like or dislike!  We want our babies to have a wide taste pallet!  Don’t limit your baby to only the foods you like, especially if you are picky!
  7. Watch carefully to see when your baby has had enough.  A baby may turn his head, close his mouth, bat the spoon away, or become fussy.  Do not force food.  Remember, the majority of your baby’s calories should be coming from breast milk or formula.
  8. It makes no difference to a baby if he gets green beans for breakfast!  There is no right or wrong food for each meal.
  9. Start with one meal a day and then move to twice a day.  By 9 months of age, most babies are enjoying solid foods and are eating 3 meals a day.
  10. There should be “dinner and a show!”  Babies like smiles, airplane spoons, songs, and fun with the meal.  Enjoy it!

Tips for making mealtime easier?

  1. Show your baby how you take a bite and enjoy your food.  This may encourage a reluctant eater.
  2. Use the upper lip to sweep food off the spoon.
  3. Dress yourself and your baby in clothes that won’t be hurt by a messy eater!  Many times I stripped my little ones down and sometimes a bath was necessary after the meal!  Babies are messy eaters….no way to get around that!
  4. Use suction cup bottomed bowels.  Keep your baby’s hands busy, give him a spoon to hold too!
  5. No pressure.  It is O.K. if your baby misses a meal.  If your baby is fighting the solid foods, skip a meal or two and then try again.  Remember, solids are mainly an education to taste and texture.  Your baby should be receiving most of his nutrition from breast milk or formula.

What about water and  juice?

Babies do not need any other liquid besides breast milk or formula for the first 4 to 6 months.  This means no juice or water.  Once solid foods are introduced, a baby should be introduced to a cup.  Water may be given in a cup with a meal.  Your baby will probably just take a few sips.  Juice is not recommended for the first year.  Juice provides very little nutritional value and has a lot of empty calories.

What about allergies?

Some health care providers may suggest waiting to start foods like eggs, fish, or peanut butter until your baby is older because of the risk of food allergies.  Studies have shown that avoidance of foods does not prevent the allergy and may actually increase the incidence of food allergies.  In January of 2010, the American Academy of Pediatrics issued new guidelines recommending that foods should not be avoided unless there was a significant family history of food allergies.  Check with your health care provider regarding his or her suggestions about these foods.

One food that should be avoided until after the first birthday is honey.  Honey carries the risk of your baby developing botulism.  This does not include honey that is in foods like crackers or cereal, only pure honey.

How will I know if my baby is allergic to a food?

If your baby has vomiting, diarrhea, a new diaper rash or skin rash including hives, or develops wheezing, then this could be a food allergy.  If your baby has gas, or a tummy ache it may just be a food intolerance.  If you think your baby has had an allergic response or an intolerance, you should stop giving the food to your baby.  You might try the food again in a couple of months if the reaction was mild and your baby may do just fine.  If there was a more severe reaction like vomiting, hives, or wheezing talk to your health care provider before giving the food again.

What about homemade baby food?

Some parents choose to make baby food.  To be honest, if you are waiting to start solids until your baby is 6 months old, your little one will not eat true puree food for very long.  Most babies will start finger foods at about 8 months and are eating mostly table food by  11 months of age.    It is not terribly difficult or time-consuming to make baby food.  You may choose to make all of your own, or use some store-bought and some homemade.  Your baby will also do just fine if you choose to use all store-bought.  Here are some tips for making your own.

  • You will need something to grind or puree food.  You might use a blender, food processor or simply a fork as your little one gets used to texture.
  • You will need storage containers like ice-cube trays or something similar.  There are trays made just for baby food, but ice-cube trays will work just the same.
  • Choose fruits and vegetables that are in season and fresh, or frozen for the best nutritional value.
  • Wash your hands well.
  • Wash the fruit and vegetables well!
  • Bake, boil, or steam the vegetables or fruit.  You then can mash or puree using water or breast milk/formula.  If you boil the vegetables/fruit, use the leftover liquid to mash the food to prevent loss of nutrients in the water.
  • Peel and pit fruits and vegetables and strain if necessary.
  • You can use seasoning!  Babies like flavor!  Try to stay away from salt.
  • Remove skin and trim fat from meat.  You can puree cooked meat, or grind it, or simply cut it up into very small pieces for an older baby.
  • Freeze the food  in ice-cube trays.  Remove the cubes of food and store in labeled freezer bags.  One cube is about 1 ounce of food.
  • When ready, thaw the amount you will use.  If your baby does not eat all the food prepared in the dish, it must be thrown out, it cannot be saved.
  • Use caution heating with a microwave.  Microwaves can cause hot spots..be sure to stir and test the food.

There are many books with tips and recipes for making baby food.  Some of my favorites include:

Super Baby Food   By:  RuthYaron

Baby Bites   By:   Bridget Swinney

Top 100 Baby Purees:  100 Quick and Easy Meals for a Healthy and Happy Baby   By:   Annabel Karmel

So, the introduction of solids really should not make you anxious, it should be exciting and fun!  Enjoy this milestone for you and your baby!  Your baby’s first taste of solid food only happens once!  Don’t over think the process.  Get ready for dinner and a show!

Take a breath, enjoy the joyful moments of each day, and remember you don’t have to be perfect to be the perfect parent.

Cindy

Resources

American Academy of Pediatrics

www.askdrsears.com

www.napnap.org

www.superbabyfood.com

www.wholsomebabyfood.com

 

This Valentine’s Day, Commit to 4 Goals….


Valentine

Commit to your relationships with 4 simple goals…..

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner. Walking into Target, the aisles are full of pink and red and signage promising if you purchase this your Valentine will forever be yours! Yes, Valentine’s Day may be a marketing ploy more than a real day to celebrate love, but it is a great time to stop and think about your relationship at home. Let’s be honest, parenting can be tough. It takes a lot of effort to raise children, and there are points during the child raising process that there just does not seem time for anything else! But the fact is, time spent on your relationship with each other is vitally important for your happiness and your child’s. So often the blessing of children results in both parents totally concentrating on their children and not putting any effort into their relationship with each other. I was guilty of this at times. When our four children were younger, I can remember times when the only conversation I had with my husband revolved around if we had enough milk and who was driving to the next sporting event! Not a whole lot of romance there….but more importantly not a whole lot of relationship building. A relationship will not stay healthy for 18 years if there is only effort put forth on raising children! So as Valentine’s Day approaches, take a moment and thing about investing in each other……a few thoughts to get the process going….

One of the best pieces of advice I ever read was from a book Creative Counterpart. Over the years I have put this philosophy to work, recommitting to this over and over again when life became unbalanced.

Set four goals each day.

  • One goal should be for you. Something that you will do that day to “fill yourself up.” Remember an empty pitcher cannot give anything. Some days that might be 30 minutes of reading, maybe time to reflect, maybe a run, or possibly a big bowl of ice cream and chocolate! Something for yourself.
  • A second goal should be for your husband. Not something for him to DO, but something you do for him. I call it every day intimacy…this might be concentrating that day on giving a compliment or two, maybe leaving a post-it love note, an extra kiss or cuddle for no reason…something to build relationship.  Get creative!
  • A third goal should be for your child. Something little you will do extra with him or her. Maybe you will read an extra story, or you finally will get the finger paints out, or bake cookies, or just a few minutes of extra cuddle time before bed.  Again, these are small goals…nothing crazy like trips to Disney.
  • Finally a goal for your home. Kids and life can result in chaos in a home. I am not talking about a goal to wash walls and baseboards, but a small daily goal to control the chaos. Maybe today you will wipe out all the bathroom sinks, tomorrow you will put the laundry away, or maybe you will dust or vacuum one room.  These small goals will result in a home that feels more content rather than chaotic.

Those four daily goals will bring balance to your life. Every day kindness will become a habit and some of the negativity that creeps into many relationships when kids become the center of life will be squelched. Take time to remember why you fell in love.

Recommit to living your life and not being dragged along for the ride. Fill yourself up, give to your relationships, and take a bit of control in your home. Now fold to the pressure and go buy Valentines for your special someones…everyone needs to be reminded that they are loved.

Take a breath, enjoy the joyful moments of each day, and remember you don’t have to be perfect to be the perfect parent.

Cindy

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